Okay…this is just sad.

 

       I had two bedrooms remodeled in late June and the early days of July. My son did all the work. Both turned out excellent. New floors, freshly painted walls and ceilings. All the furniture, the clothes, TVs, everything in the bedrooms had to be placed in my living room, the hallway, my office. My house looked like a hoarder’s house. You know, like the HOARDER’S television series. It was terrible, especially since I am claustrophobic. Anyway, we – my son and I – thought this was a great time to get rid of stuff, empty out the shed, and make a little money. I said he could have all the money we made from the sales.

 

       So the night before the yard sale we set up the garage (I parked outside), placed those neon circles with prices on the items to be sold. At 5:00 a.m. I was up and ready to go. My son showed up at 5:30, and we opened for business at 6:00. We made a measly $11.00. And, dang, we had some pretty good items for sale. Furniture in great condition at very low prices.

 

       The morning was hot. Arizona was in a heat wave. Yeah, I know, Arizona is always hot, but this was a broiling heat wave. By 8:00 the temperature was reaching 95 degrees and I was begging to pack it in. My son insisted that we stay on the job until nine. “We’re having bonding time, Mom,” he said, encouragingly. No, it was more like heat stroke time! By 8:30, I had enough bonding time and so we closed shop. Since it was the end of Shark Week I had put out some beautifully framed Orcas and Bottlenose dolphins pictures. Yeah, I understand they are not sharks but they live in the ocean, too. So I really thought they’d go quickly. But no. What the heck is wrong with people? IT. WAS. SHARK. WEEK. In the end I had to give my son $5.00 to get an Egg McMuffin. So, I lost more than I gained. But you know what is really pathetic about all this? Even more pathetic than the lousy $11.00 we made? We forgot to put out our Yard Sale signs. We were lucky a few cars passing by saw our things outside and stopped to take a look.

 

       It’s a good laugh though. However, my daughter needs to stop telling people about my $11.00 minus $5.00 yard sale. After all, she and her beagle slept through the entire sale so she had no room to talk. Folks think it’s hilarious. And it is, but it’s also embarrassing.

 

     Originally, I meant to just give my things to Goodwill. I should have stuck with that plan because in the end I had to call them to come collect the furniture. Goodwill is a great charity organization. I hope they make good money selling the donations.

 

     I hate yard sales. Never again!